Secrets and Lies


Throughout that weekend all Dave could think about was the station and wanting to make sure that it was all right. So to assure him of that, we took a cab to the building and went up to the station to reassure him that the building and all of its belongings were still there.
"You need to loosen up," I said as we stepped off the elevator and into the office.
Dave just looked around and went inside to his office.
"I just want to make sure that everything is still here." He said to me.
"I don't think that it's going to go anywhere." I said back to him, I sat down on the sofa.
"Mr. James, yourself, and I have to go over this budget and I wanted to grab it so I could look over it through the weekend."
I just stared at him, "You really do need to loosen up, all you do is work."
Dave sat at his desk and looked at me.
"You are beautiful when you are angry,"
"Don't start this with me again." I said. Dave just smiled at me, "but you are so cute when you give me that smirky grin." All I could do is just sit there as I watched Dave go through his desk to make sure that the budget report was there. Well, he found it. But all I could picture in my mind was a phantom relaxing weekend for the both of us going down while we worked on reviewing the budget.
About an hour later we returned to his apartment, he sat down on his couch and opened up his briefcase.
"Do you really think that is necessary?" I asked him.
He gave me a funny look, "Why do you say that for?"
"Well," I started, "today is Saturday and you have only been away from the station for a little over a day. Don't you think that this review can wait?"
Dave grabbed my hand and pulled me down on top of his lap. "Oh, my dear, if you only knew how crazy Mr. James becomes this time of year."
"What time of year?"
"The time of year that the budget review comes." I lifted my brow in confusion.
"Well, if you are dead set on doing this. I guess we shall." I replied. I got off his lap and sat next to him. Then I grabbed the copy of the budget that Dave handed me and started looking through it.
"Oh," I said, I thought I saw something outrageous.
"What is it?"
"Have you looked over this at all?" I asked.
"Yeah, just a glimpse here and there. I haven't had time to sit down and give it a thorough look."
I pointed out to him that we were six thousand dollars over budget and most of it was due to miscellaneous charges that were unaccounted for.
"There is no reason that this kind of money should go out and you don't know where it goes." I said. I continued to look through. "We also have charges to the station that is labeled under rooming. We don't send reporters on overnight assignments."
"I know, that is from last year when we went to the Hamptons for a weekend." Dave replied to me.
"You charged it to the station?" I asked. "No wonder Jimmy is going to have a heart attack when he sees this."
Dave gave me a look, "How did you figure this out so fast?"
"It's not that hard." I replied. "I just can't explain it though."
"Well, I will talk to the rest of the staff on Monday, I guess I really can't do anything about it now."
"No, you can't." I said. "Are you going to stop working now?"
Dave put his briefcase aside and gave me a kiss. "So, what are we going to do now?"
"Well," I began, "I was hoping that we could relax this weekend because, I don't know about you, but I have been working non-stop for sometime now and I thought that since we had a four day weekend that we could do… absolutely nothing."
"Oh my," he said, "in a big city like this and not do a damn thing?"
"Exactly."
"That's going to be hard."
"I know." I smiled.

We had a great weekend, we just sat around and watched television mostly. I think that we grew close together that weekend. I had never felt that close to anyone in a long time. It felt nice to have someone like Dave in my life.


**********************

Our wonderful weekend drew to a close that Monday when we had to go back to work. As soon as Dave got into the office he had to go downtown to City Hall to see about getting a press pass for Matthew to interview construction workers about the city sewer sytem. I sat at the conference table looking over the budget report.
"Hi, Audrey,"
I turned my head, "Oh, hi Catherine."
"How was your weekend?"
"Great, how was yours?"
Catherine proceeded to tell me about her trip. She and her brother had gone to Atlantic City for a fun-filled gambling weekend. "OH. I was so afraid that I was going to lose all the money I had won on that stupid roulette table. So, what did you and Dave do?”
"What makes you think we did anything together this weekend?" I asked her with a smile.
"Oh, now, come on. You can't give me a grin like that and expect me not to think that you didn't do anything."
I told her about our weekend. Just sitting at home and watching television.
"You know, this is great."
"What is?" I asked.
"You and Dave. I have never seen him so happy. Not even when he was with Lisa, because all they did was fight."
I really didn't like it when others spoke of Lisa and Dave's relationship. It made me feel a little jealous and uneasy. You could say that it was the estrogen going through my veins.
"Oh," is all I could say.
"Really, Audrey. I see the way that you two act around each other. Now don't tell me that you aren't falling really hard for him because I can see it in your eyes."
"I don't think now is the right time for us to talk about this."
"Why not?"
I looked across the room and saw Lisa sitting at her desk and she wasn't looking over at the table in very friendly glances.
"Don't worry about her," Catherine said, "she's just jealous because now she realizes that it was a mistake on her part for breaking up with Dave." she stood up.
"I thought it was mutual." I thought to myself. Catherine walked back over to her desk and started to work before the traffic report was to come on.

I think that Dave was at the mayor's office all day. It was getting pretty late and everyone started to head home. I was the last one to leave because I was waiting on Dave to get back. He didn’t even call. I packed my paperwork into my case and took a cab home.
When I got home I watched a little television before I decided to take a bath. It would feel so nice because of the heat and humidity outside. I just wanted to be comfortable. I went and drew my water, lit a few candles, and relaxed in my round garden tub. I put my hair up and rested my head on the edge behind me. My eyes started to close and I let myself relax.
I started to think of Dave. He was great, wasn't he? Just being near him made everything so perfect. It had been a long time since I had been comfortable around any man. So many years it had taken me to get through the pain that I had endured once before. I tried to erase those memories, but it was hard. They were still stuck in my mind like it happened the day before.
I also never let anyone know my true identity. It was easy for me to keep that a secret because I never got close to anyone to be honest. Being a newswoman didn't bother it either, because I wasn't a big name like Barbara Walters or Joan Lunden. When it happened to me I was just starting out. I knew that the one day would come when I would tell Dave everything about me. I just didn't know when that day would be.
I wasn't ashamed of my past. It just hurt to think about losing the "one" love of your life. Moving on then wasn't an option for me. I just wanted to sit and hold the cherished memories that we shared. I was married a year after I graduated high school, I knew that this man was the one for me. I grew up in a broken and dysfunctional home and I knew that college was my only way out. Except a month before I left for college he swept me off my feet and a year later we got married.
Things were uneasy at first. We were dirt poor and both college students. Todd was two years older than me and he was the first to graduated out of undergrad school. Then we both worked and went to school full-time so life wasn't easy. I took a year off from school so he could get his PhD in psychology. After that things were looking up, he was hired by the FBI as a field profiler and two years later I was out of grad school with a degree in broadcasting. I started working for a local CBS affiliate in Indianapolis as a weekend anchor.
After seven years of marriage that the first five were the hardest. We were finally working jobs that we wanted to do. We survived all the obstacles that were thrown in our way. We even had a baby due when this fairy tale came to a tragic end. Todd, it seems, was working on a case that went to trial. After the murder suspect was convicted. He grabbed one of the policeman's guns and started firing shot after shot at my husband. Killing him and shooting me in the lower abdomen, killing my unborn baby when I was six months pregnant. I don't remember much of what happened directly after that, but the pain was unbearable. I was in shock and in depression and I wanted my life to end. That's when I finally sold the house that Todd and I built together and my family talked me into taking a new job in Toronto. Prompting me to change my name and start a whole new life where no one would be giving me looks and glances and start whispering behind my back about the loss of my husband and where no one knew my story that was all over the news.
Two years later I flew back to Indy to be with my family. That's where I met a man named Jack. I met him at my husband's grave site. I guess this Jack guy worked with Todd on the case the cost him his life. Jack was also the one to shoot down the convicted murderer after he fired shots at my husband.
Jack and I started to become close friends. He even offered to help me through the rough time I had experienced and he was the reason that I moved to Oakdale where he lived and where his cousin's wife's mother owned the CBS affiliate there, Lucinda Walsh at WOAK. That's where I became big in the states.

****************************************

The rest of my story is coming to New York as a favor to Lucinda, the I end up staying here. I just knew that the time would come when I would have to let all my secrets loose to Dave, and his to me. But the pain was still there, and I didn't want anyone to know my secret that brought all the pain out.

I lied in my tub and had a hot washcloth over my eyes when my doorbell rang. I really didn't want to get up and answer it. But the bell kept going on and on. Finally I got up and put my robe on. Then went to the door and swung it open. There stood Dave with a bouquet of white lillies, my favorite flower.
"Hi," he smiled, "did I interrupt something?"
I smiled back at him, "No, you didn't." I let him in.


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